Whether we like to admit it or not, there is a secret to success in the world of Search Engine Optimization, in any business realm in fact, but no one has the guts to talk about it. Perhaps it is a performance enhancer, but as Lance Armstrong can attest, if it comes with results, what does that even matter (well, at least for a few years)? The truth is, if it weren’t for this key player in our lives, the world would fall apart. Not just companies, but the natural world. Mountains would crumble like sand castles. Bees would start dropping dead out of nowhere. Earthquakes would shatter nations. All-out apocalypse!
The secret is coffee. Yes, coffee, in all of its dark majesty. You see, coffee was invented exclusively for Search Engine Optimizers by the espresso gods. The saw, they took pity, because they knew. When a man walks into his office and seats himself in front of his screen his soul is dreary, his mind clouded. The screen’s glare is prominent even in broad daylight. Nothing would alleviate this torment. Except coffee.
The man sluggishly limps over to the communal coffee pot (or, in our Rocky Mountain Search Engine Academy office, to our most important SEO tool: our Jura Capresso espresso machine), groaning like a soulless zombie, driven by a nameless craving. He pours the elixir into a cup and as he takes his first sip… Bam! Technicolor! The light bulb above his head illuminates the room. The soul of life returns. He receives high-fives from every co-worker. His blood runs hot and a fire burns in his eyes. It is a fire of passion, of efficiency, of vigor. Pure stamina rushes through the veins. Insights fill his mind. His fingers thrill to the keys as he creates content, savors analytics, maps out a strategy, and even seeks linking opportunities. He is the Ubermensch, the superman of the SEO world. Nothing holds him back. Not even Free Bagel Thursday. He is strong, independent, and powerful.
This, my friends is what leads to success in the Search Engine Optimization circle. This, is what holds not only businesses, not only artists, but nations together.
This is what occupies my mind as 2012 draws to a close and I just don’t want to be serious for another moment.
Happy New Year!